Master Manipulator
I can only hope she'll use her powers for good and not evil. I don't think it likely, but I can hope.
Today, after ballet, I took Pie to the bookstore in my quest for some design books. Now that I know that a designer is out of the budget, I've taken it upon myself to educate myself at least minimally on design. Which meant standing for about 45 minutes in the Design/Interior Decorating section of Barnes and Noble, trying to figure out how The Big Book of Window Treatments is different from Design Ideas for Window Treatments, which is different from Window Treatments Idea Book how? I couldn't figure it out, so standing there in the aisles of the store, I not-so-discreetly put all the books on reserve at my local library. The one book that really did look interesting, though, was a $45 book (only $30 at Amazon), which is on hold by many other people, but I'm on the waiting list, too, because I'm trying to save all available cash reserves for, oh, you know, furniture.
But the Pie was a patient girl, and while she made many requests for a book of her own, I was able to dissuade her and keep her nearby. I took my time, browsing the 50% off table and looking through the writing books. To appease her, I told her she could pick out a magazine for herself to read while we got a treat. Ladybug or Nat Geo Little Kids maybe or even Highlights High Five, if I was feeling particularly generous. She was pleased with this idea and I figured it would buy me time to look at the design magazines.
So off to the magazines we go. And then she began. "Brides! I see brides! Weddings! Look, Mommy, a wedding magazine! Can I have a wedding magazine? How about just a small one. Please? PUH-LEASE? Mommy, I really need a wedding magazine. I need it for me and Jasmine. Mommy, I want a wedding magazine. See, Mommy, this one is a little one? Can't I have just a little wedding magazine? Just a little one? It's okay, Mommy, just a little one. Mommy, I really, really want a wedding magazine! Please? Please? Please? Please?"
I insisted not, that there was just something morally repugnant about buying a three-year-old a wedding magazine (although I didn't state it in those words), and that no, absolutely not, she could not have a wedding magazine, the kid magazine are just over there and she can have whatever kid magazine she wants.
"But Mommy I want a wedding magazine! With a bride! I need a bride. Oh, please, Mommy, oh please! Oh all right. Where are the kid magazines? Look! Look! Look, Mommy, look! Cinderella is on this magazine! Can I have this magazine? Oh, please! Can I have the Cinderella magazine," to which I quickly replied, "Sure!"
It wasn't until I had paid for the magazine, purchased a vanilla milk, and was reading some inane cartoon about Snow White that I realized the girl had completely hoodwinked me. I mean, on what planet was I going to buy her a princess magazine? But that master manipulating mind of hers realized if she posited it against the wedding magazines, it was a no brainer! Of course she could have the princess magazine! (Did I use the word posit correctly there? Hmmm...)
That girl is smart! And it scares me. I need to increase brain power. Maybe start doing crossword puzzles or something? Someday she's going to be a powerful CEO. Or world leader. Or grifter. Hard to tell at this point.
Note: This post brought to you by copious amounts of Noggin and homemade chocolate chip cookies. I'm going for the coolest mom award today.
Today, after ballet, I took Pie to the bookstore in my quest for some design books. Now that I know that a designer is out of the budget, I've taken it upon myself to educate myself at least minimally on design. Which meant standing for about 45 minutes in the Design/Interior Decorating section of Barnes and Noble, trying to figure out how The Big Book of Window Treatments is different from Design Ideas for Window Treatments, which is different from Window Treatments Idea Book how? I couldn't figure it out, so standing there in the aisles of the store, I not-so-discreetly put all the books on reserve at my local library. The one book that really did look interesting, though, was a $45 book (only $30 at Amazon), which is on hold by many other people, but I'm on the waiting list, too, because I'm trying to save all available cash reserves for, oh, you know, furniture.
But the Pie was a patient girl, and while she made many requests for a book of her own, I was able to dissuade her and keep her nearby. I took my time, browsing the 50% off table and looking through the writing books. To appease her, I told her she could pick out a magazine for herself to read while we got a treat. Ladybug or Nat Geo Little Kids maybe or even Highlights High Five, if I was feeling particularly generous. She was pleased with this idea and I figured it would buy me time to look at the design magazines.
So off to the magazines we go. And then she began. "Brides! I see brides! Weddings! Look, Mommy, a wedding magazine! Can I have a wedding magazine? How about just a small one. Please? PUH-LEASE? Mommy, I really need a wedding magazine. I need it for me and Jasmine. Mommy, I want a wedding magazine. See, Mommy, this one is a little one? Can't I have just a little wedding magazine? Just a little one? It's okay, Mommy, just a little one. Mommy, I really, really want a wedding magazine! Please? Please? Please? Please?"
I insisted not, that there was just something morally repugnant about buying a three-year-old a wedding magazine (although I didn't state it in those words), and that no, absolutely not, she could not have a wedding magazine, the kid magazine are just over there and she can have whatever kid magazine she wants.
"But Mommy I want a wedding magazine! With a bride! I need a bride. Oh, please, Mommy, oh please! Oh all right. Where are the kid magazines? Look! Look! Look, Mommy, look! Cinderella is on this magazine! Can I have this magazine? Oh, please! Can I have the Cinderella magazine," to which I quickly replied, "Sure!"
It wasn't until I had paid for the magazine, purchased a vanilla milk, and was reading some inane cartoon about Snow White that I realized the girl had completely hoodwinked me. I mean, on what planet was I going to buy her a princess magazine? But that master manipulating mind of hers realized if she posited it against the wedding magazines, it was a no brainer! Of course she could have the princess magazine! (Did I use the word posit correctly there? Hmmm...)
That girl is smart! And it scares me. I need to increase brain power. Maybe start doing crossword puzzles or something? Someday she's going to be a powerful CEO. Or world leader. Or grifter. Hard to tell at this point.
Note: This post brought to you by copious amounts of Noggin and homemade chocolate chip cookies. I'm going for the coolest mom award today.
Labels: pie
2 Comments:
Who is a grifter?
From dictionary.com:
grifter (n), a person who swindles you by means of deception or fraud
Grift is an old term meaning a confidence game.
There's a great movie I recommend (mostly because I adore John Cusack) called The Grifters:
Roy Dillon: It's great to get away, isn't it? Take some time off. Next week, I'll be back to work.
Myra Langtry: You already went back to work.
Roy Dillon: What?
Myra Langtry: I watched you, working the tat on those sailor boys.
Roy Dillon: Working the what?
Myra Langtry: Oh, come on, Roy, the tat. What you do for a living.
Roy Dillon: I'm a salesman.
Myra Langtry: You're on the grift, same as me.
Roy Dillon: Myra, I'm not following you.
Myra Langtry: Roy, you're a short-con operator... and a good one, I think. Don't talk to me like I'm another square!
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