Every Child a Stoner Child
This is the only scenario I can imagine: a group of TV creatives sat around a conference table, their careers at stake. The networks needed something new, something to compete with The O.C. and The Simple Life. Something to grab that 18 to 24 market. As the TV men (and they must be men because women would be smarter) drank their Chai Creme Frapachinos, they contemplated what the 18 to 24 set does.
"Summer time is approaching," they must have thought. "What do these kids do over the summer? Who can we best sell our Doritos and Oreos and Mountain Dew to? Ah, the crowd that has the munchies! Let's make stoner TV!"
Now, being respectable TV men, they weren't sure what stoner TV would be like. So one evening they dropped a copious amount of acid and went to work. "There should be these space creatures!" one would have said.
"No, no," says another, "not space creatures. They should be 'five magical atoms of power, light and fun!'"
"Excellent," says another. "And they should live in pods that whirl in an iridescent glow of rainbow light!"
"And they should dance!" adds yet another. "Hypnotic trance-like dancing to hypnotic trance music."
"People can play with different household items, doing weird things with them."
"Yes, yes, yes!" another says and they begin developing this far-out show. Psychedelic lights. Bright colors. The atoms of light.
So finally the show was done. And as networks everywhere must do, they tested their show. Nothing like a focus group to tell you what you're supposed to think. Gathering a roomful of potheads, the network execs excitedly screened their new offering. Ah, the lights. Ah, the music. Ah, the dancing. Ah, the atoms of power, light, and fun. And you know what happened? Those potheads freaked out. Screaming, pulling hair, shaking violently. They just couldn't take it. This show was way, way, way too out there for them.
The TV men began to freak. They accidentally out stoned the stoners. This show had to work. Their careers were on the line.
"So what do we do?" cried one in panic. "Who will watch our show?"
They huddled together and tried to salvage what they could. Their budget was nearly depleted so few changes could be made. They tossed ideas back and forth. Could it be the next Friends? Just add some twentysomethings. Maybe they should make it a reality show. Add in a live behind-the-scenes camera. Maybe it could become the next Law and Order ripoff. A few cops, a morgue, a little blood. Unfortunately, all of this was too expensive.
"What can we afford?" one asked.
"We can't even afford minimum wage. All we can afford is kids. Really, really young kids."
Eyes lit up. The "ding ding ding" was practically audible.
"Kids, hmmmm?"
In a matter of days the potheads were replaced with the under four set. Everything else--the psychedelic lights, the trance music, the weird storylines and odd narrator--remained the same. Even the name, Boohbah, still worked. Pop it on PBS, and the TV execs knew they'd hit paydirt.
Okay, so maybe that's not really how the show came about. But I can't figure out any other reasonable explanation for this show. Doodles loves the show. Again, he only watches TV in about ten minutes spurts on those days when I'm just beat (which tends to be those rainy days when we're cooped up and I've exhausted every song and toy I can think of), so it's not like he watches it daily or even weekly. But when it does come on, his eyes get that zoned out look that wouldn't be out of place at a college dorm at 2 a.m. on a Saturday night.
I wish I could do this show justice in my description, but I simply can't. It must be watched to be believed. However, if you're over the age of two, you may want to get yourself into an "alternative" state first. It won't make any sense otherwise.
"Summer time is approaching," they must have thought. "What do these kids do over the summer? Who can we best sell our Doritos and Oreos and Mountain Dew to? Ah, the crowd that has the munchies! Let's make stoner TV!"
Now, being respectable TV men, they weren't sure what stoner TV would be like. So one evening they dropped a copious amount of acid and went to work. "There should be these space creatures!" one would have said.
"No, no," says another, "not space creatures. They should be 'five magical atoms of power, light and fun!'"
"Excellent," says another. "And they should live in pods that whirl in an iridescent glow of rainbow light!"
"And they should dance!" adds yet another. "Hypnotic trance-like dancing to hypnotic trance music."
"People can play with different household items, doing weird things with them."
"Yes, yes, yes!" another says and they begin developing this far-out show. Psychedelic lights. Bright colors. The atoms of light.
So finally the show was done. And as networks everywhere must do, they tested their show. Nothing like a focus group to tell you what you're supposed to think. Gathering a roomful of potheads, the network execs excitedly screened their new offering. Ah, the lights. Ah, the music. Ah, the dancing. Ah, the atoms of power, light, and fun. And you know what happened? Those potheads freaked out. Screaming, pulling hair, shaking violently. They just couldn't take it. This show was way, way, way too out there for them.
The TV men began to freak. They accidentally out stoned the stoners. This show had to work. Their careers were on the line.
"So what do we do?" cried one in panic. "Who will watch our show?"
They huddled together and tried to salvage what they could. Their budget was nearly depleted so few changes could be made. They tossed ideas back and forth. Could it be the next Friends? Just add some twentysomethings. Maybe they should make it a reality show. Add in a live behind-the-scenes camera. Maybe it could become the next Law and Order ripoff. A few cops, a morgue, a little blood. Unfortunately, all of this was too expensive.
"What can we afford?" one asked.
"We can't even afford minimum wage. All we can afford is kids. Really, really young kids."
Eyes lit up. The "ding ding ding" was practically audible.
"Kids, hmmmm?"
In a matter of days the potheads were replaced with the under four set. Everything else--the psychedelic lights, the trance music, the weird storylines and odd narrator--remained the same. Even the name, Boohbah, still worked. Pop it on PBS, and the TV execs knew they'd hit paydirt.
Okay, so maybe that's not really how the show came about. But I can't figure out any other reasonable explanation for this show. Doodles loves the show. Again, he only watches TV in about ten minutes spurts on those days when I'm just beat (which tends to be those rainy days when we're cooped up and I've exhausted every song and toy I can think of), so it's not like he watches it daily or even weekly. But when it does come on, his eyes get that zoned out look that wouldn't be out of place at a college dorm at 2 a.m. on a Saturday night.
I wish I could do this show justice in my description, but I simply can't. It must be watched to be believed. However, if you're over the age of two, you may want to get yourself into an "alternative" state first. It won't make any sense otherwise.
5 Comments:
I think it was a bunch of hippies instead of tv execs and they're trying to building a youth counterculture via the mass media. Look at all the counterculture messages- grandmama and grandpapa are old and silly, do not obey them. Kids- jump around with wild abandon and yell boobah. Dance with pod people. The whole thing is like a secret code for anarchy
-adam
I don't even know if I should point this out, but I cannot watch this show with my children because it seems so pornographic to me. The creatures look like male privates to me. And when they hold hands in a circle and different colored stuff squirts out of their heads to make a swirling rainbow...man, it is just not right. It is disturbing because I can't stop thinking about what they look like the whole time. No Boohbah for us.
Ohmygosh, I never looked at them that way! But you are so right... Ick!
I am glad that show freaks other people out too. I thought maybe I wasn't hip to children's programming. Keegan is too young to watch but it was on in the waitingroom at the car dealership. It was so strange I asked the other mom if we could change the channel. I've still got the willies.
Alisa
www.halffullhalfempty.com/blog
Hey! Teletubbies and Boobahs are fun!
Well, doesn’t a lot children’s television carry a counterculture or sexual subtext. Probably because it is usually young people producing these shows, and it entertains them. Except Disney, of course, which historically carries more mainstream propaganda, usually pro-war.
Teletubbies and Boobahs were actually created by an old (or much older) blue haired British woman who just seems to be real tuned into what young children like. Weird, but they DO like it.
I guess subtexts probably won't hurt our babies, and are mostly looked at by people who spend a lot of time looking for them, like pop culture academics and enthusiasts (I live with one). Also, fortunately, if it is on PBS, it usually isn’t selling anything. Safe from Cheerios and Oreo toys, unlike our poor public school systems, now relying on advertising dollars.
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