Scream a Little Scream

We'll see how much I get to post tonight. Sweetie Pie has rediscovered the joys of a fussy evening. Right now, she's swaddled next to me in bed, having just sated herself after twenty minutes at my br*east. Every night now, she gets herself completely worked up. Last night she fell asleep in my mei tai after about a half hour of bloody murder screaming, and she was so worked up that she was doing those horrible gasp/breaths in her sleep. She's doing that lovely, sleep for two hours and then fuss until she gets to nurse again. She's incapable of soothing herself to sleep at night. It's a little frustrating--never mind sore--for me.

Oddly enough, though, it really doesn't bother me so much. Oh, it bothers me that my incredible little Sweetie Pie is so miserable. But I know that she'll be past this phase soon enough. I can't believe that she'll be four months old this Sunday. Where did it all go?

Having Sweetie Pie is so surreal. It's still hard for me to believe I have a daughter. I have to remind myself often that I'm the mom of two. She'll look up at me with her huge wondering eyes, as if asking me to explain myself, and I'll just think, "Now where did you come from?"

I could so do three. Screaming or no screaming, I could definitely do three. If only our bank account could do three....