For Parents Only (Nonparents Just Don't Want to Go Here)

Pee on the armchair. Pee on the floor. Um, something a little worse in the playroom. Sweetie Pie, you think? Oh, but if that were the case. No, it's Doodles. Doodles whose favorite person in the entire world, E., who shall henceforth be referred to as Grape for her fondness of wearing purple, is potty trained and wearing big-girl underwear. Whenever Grape is over and uses the potty, Doodles has to go too. And he does, quite successfully. So when he asked for the tenth time for big-boy underwear, I so no reason not to comply. My plan was to potty train this summer, when he was closer to three and when summer clothes are easier to remove (all those layers in winter). But if he's asking, who am I to stop him?

So we went to Kohl's, picked out a lovely selection of big-boy underwear (Thomas the Tank Engine, Bob the Builder, and of course, The Wiggles), got a few "treats" for successful pottying, and headed home. The underwear went on immediately and sure enough, he peed in the potty. Success! He got a Thomas the Train sticker for the lovely potty chart I made him. He was happy. I was happy.

And that worked for... exactly that one day. After that one day, he wanted to wear his underpants. Crying, desperate, want to wear underpants. But he doesn't want to remove them to go to the potty. He wanders around in his shirt and underwear, denying all bodily functions. "Doodles, what's that smell?"

"Nothing."

"Doodles, I see something in your underwear. Did you poop?"

"No, no poop!" Which for some reason was much more charming when the boy wore diapers.

Puddles appear over the house. Who made them? Not Doodles!

So the answer appears to be that he's not ready to be potty trained and we hang up the underwear for a few more months. Only he still cries and whines, "I want to wear big-boy underwear! I want to wear big-boy underwear."

There's no point to this story. Just a plea for help. Any suggestions?